Men
1. Listen Carefully. Take
the time to hear what the woman is saying. If you feel
she is not being direct or is giving you a "mixed
message," ask her for clarification.
2. Don't fall for the common stereotype
that when a woman says "No" she really means "Yes." No
means No! If a woman says No to sexual contact, believe
her and stop.
3. Remember that date rape is a
crime. It is never acceptable to use force
in sexual situations, no matter what the circumstances.
4. Don't make assumptions about
a woman's behavior. Don't automatically assume
that a woman wants to have sex just because she drinks
heavily, dresses provocatively, or agrees to go to
your room. Don't assume that just because a woman has
had sex with you previously she is willing to have
sex with you again. Also don't assume that just because
a woman consents to kissing or other sexual intimacies
she is willing to have sex.
5. Be aware that having sex with
someone who is mentally or physically incapable of
giving consent (permission) is rape. If you
have sex with woman who is drugged, intoxicated, passed
out, incapable of saying "No" or unaware
of what is happening around her, you may be guilty
of rape.
6. Be especially careful in group
situations. Be prepared to resist pressure
from friends to participate in violent or criminal
acts.
7. Get involved if you believe
someone is at risk. If you see a woman in
trouble at a part or a male friend using force or pressuring
a woman, don't be afraid to intervene. You may save
the woman from the trauma of sexual assault and your
friend from the ordeal of criminal prosecution.
Women
1. Know your sexual intentions
and limits. You have the right to say "No" to
any unwanted sexual contact. If you are uncertain about
what you want, ask the man to respect your feelings.
2. Communicate your limits firmly
and directly. If you say "No", say
it like you mean it. Don't give mixed messages. Back
up your words with a firm tone of voice and clear body
language.
3. Don't rely on E.S.P. to get
your message across. Don't assume that your
date will automatically know how you feel, or will
eventually "get the message" without your
having to tell him.
4. Remember that some men think
that drinking heavily, dressing provocatively, or going
to a man's room indicates a willingness to have sex.
Be especially careful to communicate your limits and
intentions clearly in such situations.
5. Listen to your gut feelings.
If you feel uncomfortable or think you may be at risk,
leave the situation immediately and go to a safe place.
6. Don't be afraid to "make
waves" if you feel threatened. If you
feel you are being pressured or coerced into sexual
activity against your will, don't hesitate to state
your feelings and get out of the situation. Better
a few minutes of social awkwardness or embarrassment
than the trauma of sexual assault.
7. Attend large parties with friends
you can trust. Agree to "look out" for
one another. Try to leave with a group, rather than
alone or with someone you don't know very well.
Fighting Back
If all of these methods have not worked
then fighting back physically may be your best option.
Fighting back should be the absolute last resort. If
you choose this option, be prepared to give one hundred
percent of your effort.
Remember that even if you can not fight
him off, it is NOT your fault. The Savannah Rape Crisis
Center offers free Self-Defense Classes for women four
times a year. If you would like more information on the
Self Defense Classes, contact the Savannah Rape Crisis
Center at (912) 233-3000.
Fighting Back in Court
Due to the alarming statistic that one
in three women will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime,
we know that some rapes cannot be prevented. If this
ever happens to you or a friend or family member:
1. Call someone you know for support.
2. Get to the hospital within 72 hours
of the assault. Do not shower or use the bathroom. It
will wash away all the evidence.
3. Notify the police. Statistics show that
a man doesn't rape once, but many times. Make this person
legally responsible for their crime. |
